Grades End, Friendship Lasts Forever

As my friends can tell you, this post has been a long time in the making.  They've basically been holding a knife to my back for the past three weeks, asking me to write this post about them.  Okay, maybe not a knife... maybe more like a spoon.  But even spoons seem dangerous recently.  I somehow managed to cut my lip on one the other morning at breakfast.  So before I get any more oral lacerations or pommeled over the head, here you go: a post dedicated almost entirely to the friends I've made and hang out with most here at ISS.  It's a bit lengthy so get comfortable.

It's awkward for me to be writing about other people because I don't know if my perception of them matches the one they have of themselves.  Still, this has been a fun and challenging writing exercise and even if I get a few things wrong I think I know everyone well enough to know that they'll forgive me.  And if they don't, well, ISS is coming to a close so I probably won't see them for a while anyway.

The thing I was worried about most for coming to Norway was who I'd be friends with.  It doesn't matter if they're from the United States, Russia, Germany, Iran, France, Colombia, England or any other country, making friends is one of the most intimidating propositions for an introvert like me.  With each new community of people, I worry I won't be able to make friends.  It's a silly fear, really, yet it's one that is hard to disregard.  By some miracle, I've always managed to fall into a friend group but I wonder if that's due more to the acceptance of others than my dazzling social skills.  Instinctively, I'm a very quiet person.  It takes a great deal of energy for me to participate in a conversation, let alone start one.  I prefer to stay in the background, listening, only saying something when I feel it is worth saying: not exactly the perfect recipe for making friends, though perhaps the right one for making friends with the people I enjoy being friends with.  The best thing one can do is follow the age-old advice,"be yourself," and hope for a little luck.  How very lucky of I've been!

From left to right: Me, Jessica, Oksana, Brady, Zuzana, Bavo, JC

Jean-Clément

I'll start with Jean-Clément (JC) because he's the youngest in this particular group of friends, to which I will hereafter refer to as "The Brady Bunch."  Perhaps the two most important things you need to know about JC is that he's French and that he's nobility (or at least descended from nobility).  As much as he tries to act the snooty Frenchman with his two sets of silver cutlery, he's really quite a nice person.  True, we're still trying to break his habit of eating watermelon with a knife and fork and he relishes in saying "Stupid Americans!" a little too much but he only started doing the second one after we asked him to -- his accent is perfect for it.  It can be a bit difficult to understand him sometimes, particularly when he's really excited -- which is most of the time -- or after he's had a couple cups of coffee -- which makes him even more excited -- but he's usually pretty patient with us.  He's the spark plug of our group, not only for his enthusiastic personality but also his incessant inquiries of, "What are we doing today?"  It sets in motion the planning process and, whether the rest of us follow through or not, JC is there having a blast, dancing like nobody's watching, and probably taking pictures.  He is an excellent photographer -- he took many of the pictures featured in this post -- and he is an inspiration to us all.

Bavo

Zuzana took this one

What can I say about Bavo?  His team is the one that eliminated USA from the World Cup.  I can't hold that against him, though, because he's such a nice guy and none of us really care about football anyway.  Also, any held grudges could have gotten hairy because Bavo is one of my suite-mates, which means we share a shower... just let that pun sink in for a little bit.  Maybe it'll even make Bavo smile, which is something he rarely does.  It's not that he's not ecstatic to hear our annoying voices every single day -- he's perfected the subtle smirk -- he just doesn't all-out smile very often so when he does it's a precious gift that brightens our day.  He's a man of few words but many languages.  He speaks three languages fluently, but he doesn't flaunt his lingual prowess over the monolingual Americans. "You have to feel the language!" he says.  Instead, he simply uses it to communicate and, upon request, teach Brady a few new naughty phrases.  Although he's one of the youngest in the group, Bavo is mature beyond his years.  He's the quiet sentinel of almost normality -- normality being something many in the Brady Bunch lack (just kidding... or am I?) and one of the highest compliments we can give each other.  I am incredibly fortunate to be able to call Bavo my friend.

Jessica
Hanging from the Ledge of Normality over the Pit of Ger-Mania is Jessica.  Most of the time she has a firm grip on the Vine of Rationality but there are times when she gets a little loopy.  What am I saying?  She's German; of course she gets a little loopy sometimes.  As a prime example I'd like to share with you these words of wisdom so eloquently put by Jessica: "I thought to put orange marmalade on my bread and then I thought, 'Why have you done this?' It's horrible.  Taking a bite is like giving birth, but then you do it again anyway."  Though it wasn't the case in this particular instance, usually Brady is involved in Jessica's japes.  I swear, those two feed off each others' sarcastic energy like piranhas on a cow carcase.  As much as they make fun of each other and others, they, along with Oksana, made the pact that if any of them are ever in a position of power they'll make sure our countries don't go to war with one another.  In addition to being our resident German, Jessica is also the group's health nut.  I applaud her for going to the gym almost every day and enduring a place where it's hard to be a vegan.  She's extremely dedicated and diligent and is an incredibly strong person -- both of mind and will.  She could probably either single-handedly destroy your life or make it far more entertaining.  Thankfully, in my case it's the latter.

Zuzana
She's Slovak.  Not Slovakian.  Zuzana's constant crusade for correctness is one of her many positive attributes and one of the reasons she will make such an excellent script writer.  Unlike the others, I don't have anything sarcastic to say about Zuzana.  While the others are giving me a hard time about being so quiet, she just smiles because, as another introvert, she understands.  If I didn't know her well, it would be difficult to tell she's an introvert, though, because, when given the opportunity, she's usually striking up a conversation with someone.  Her voice is soft so it's sometimes difficult to hear what she said, which is unfortunate because it's usually something incredibly kind or thoughtful.  I think she cares deeply for the well-being of those around her and will go out of her way to make their day better even if that means taking time to be alone and recharge so she's not grumpy with everyone.  I marvel at the polite candor with which she can say exactly what's on her mind, be it about something that annoys her or some abstract idea; I usually have to wait until I can write it down to say what's actually on my mind.  For Zuzana it seems as natural as breathing.  Speaking of natural, it was with Zuzana (and JC) that I somehow managed to end up on a nudists' beach on one of the islands in Oslo fjord.  That was perhaps one of the our more interesting excursions.  I will be very sad to see this scene come to an end in the ever-evolving script we call life but Zuzana and all the rest of the cast will, I hope, make a reappearance in Act II.

Oksana
The crazy Russian.  In truth, she's no crazier than the rest of us but here in the Brady Bunch we like to uphold stereotypes, if only to make fun of them.  Appropriately, she taught us that the phonetic distinction between "I love you" and "I will kill you" in Russian is almost imperceptible to an American's ears.  It's become one of our standing gags along with the nicknames we have for each other.  Oksana is the one who came up with my nickname -- Bambi -- supposedly because I'm so young and sweet and innocent.  After hanging out with this group of friends for six weeks, I don't know how sweet and innocent I am anymore -- not that I was particularly sweet or innocent to begin with -- but the nickname stuck so now whenever I watch a particular Disney movie I'll think of Oksana.  To get me through the traumatic death of (SPOILERS) Bambi's mother deer-est, I'll have only to think of her wonderful Russian accent piercing through the noise of breakfast to greet me; of her stunning chimera eyes and smiling face wondering why I don't talk more but accepting it for who I am; of her "Jacqueline Kennedy" hair-style to match her personality; and of her dress-up days because, "Why not?  Can't I look good today?"  Behind the grumpy Russian demeanor, she's one of the sweetest people I have ever met.  I suppose I should entertain her Russian sense of humor and end with something mean or inappropriate but I won't, just to get back at her for all the times she tried to hug me.  At least she wasn't as bad as Brady.

Brady

"Tell me a story, Neal," as Brady -- or "Grandpa" as we like to call him -- would say.  Well, okay.  There once was a person named Brady who attended ISS four years ago with my brother.  Apparently, they stayed friends afterwards because I first met him when he visited my brother in Seattle.  Now the circle of friendship is complete and I've replaced my brother as Brady's favourite Digre.  He hasn't said so but I can tell.  In the first few days of adjusting to life in Norway, Brady's unending stream of snarky comments and knowledge from the "olden days" was an indispensable source of entertainment and comfort.  Even after I'd made so many wonderful friends that don't poke me in the ribs or squeeze the nerve in my elbow, I still find myself hanging out with Brady the most.  I mean, he is vice-president of the student council, after all.  It pays to have powerful friends, even if they're full of sarcastic remarks, like, "Oh, I'm sorry.  I shouldn't have said anything [about the party].  You're not invited but I am so that's where I'll be if you wonder."  But his quick wit and affable smile make people smile; his jests are just part of the reason he's enjoyable to be around.  Beneath the iron fist with which he subjugates the Brady Bunch and the mischievous glint in his eyes, I see a person who truly cares about his friends and enjoys forming and maintaining connections with people.  One can never be entirely sure where Brady is concerned but amongst the stream of mockery that emanates from his mouth are tucked gems of twisted sincerity that, I think, characterise our friend group.  For example: the title of this post and, with only the slightest hint of sarcasm, "We have each other and that's all that matters."  The End.

I'd like to devote an entire paragraph to every single wonderful person I've met during my time here at the International Summer School but I'd also like to get some sleep in the next week.  Those whose names are not underlined are no less important to me and no less my friend.  It's simply a matter of who kept nagging me to write about them.

Though they certainly add to the unique atmosphere, it's not the classes or the places that make an experience like the International Summer School so memorable; it's the people you meet, the adventures you share, and the friendships formed to last a lifetime.  Classes end, test scores are forgotten, textbooks are packed away, but the friends you make will always linger in your heart and mind.  It's been such a fantastic experience and I'll be sad to have to say good-bye.  It's only for a short while, though; we have all our lives ahead of us to travel, to visit each other, to form stronger connections between ourselves and our countries.

In a world fraught with fear and violence the best remedy is friendship and understanding.  It can't solve all of the world's problems, not by a long shot, but it's a start.  The students of today will be the leaders of tomorrow.  Maybe, with a cultured world-view and the help of institutions such as the International Summer School, we as humans will be able to put aside the oppression, anger, and violence and begin to live on this beautiful Earth with all it's mountains, fjords, deserts, glaciers, lakes, and streams as it was meant to be lived on: in peace, prosperity, and friendship.

I know this post got really long and I know it may not have been the easiest thing to follow if you don't know the people I'm talking about but I hope you enjoyed reading it anyway.  Having now traveled and studied abroad, I sincerely believe that friendship, understanding, and communication is the path to a better future.  Whenever you travel, wherever you travel, with every new person you meet, I hope you try to see the world as I see it -- not through the limited vision of your own prejudices but through the eyes of an open-minded traveler.  To help you along the way, I will continue to share my thoughts and experiences as I travel throughout Norway for a week and a half after ISS comes to an end; and beyond, as I continue to travel for the rest of my life.  Stay tuned.  -NLD